Gabrielle Agee

I am an intensely sentimental person, have been ever since I was a kid. Boxes filled with letters and cards from any and every occasion have always spilled out from under my bed. All are considered special by me, but one box, in particular, is more important than the rest. With this project, I open that box and let the contents pour out, releasing the emotions that come with it. The box contains all that I have left of my best friend and soulmate Cecilia. Almost a year ago, she took her own life.

I have been through my fair share of hardships and pain in life, but nothing I have ever experienced was as painful as losing the most important person to me. It wasn’t necessarily the biggest surprise given that she had struggled with mental illness for years but that did nothing to ease my hurt. I have fluctuated throughout the whole emotional spectrum ranging from deep heart-wrenching sadness to violent passionate anger within the past year. My heart will never be whole again, but I have managed to find some forms of comfort: she is gone,  but her presence is eternal. I feel her in the wind and the sunshine, in her old sweatshirt, in my growing garden of sunflowers just for her, our photos and videos… but most strongly, I feel her in her letters. I am able to touch what she touched and hear her speak to me again. I would give anything for her to say one more thing to me, but for now, I have to settle with just being able to feel her.